Did you ever notice that so many holiday movies have a “people matter more than money” theme? Think of Scrooge in A Christmas Carol or Buddy's father Walter in Elf. While always a nice feel-good theme, I don’t think we need to be reminded to put our loved ones before our bank accounts. For most of us, knowing our priorities isn’t the challenge -- living in the moment, however, is.

Have any of these situations ever happened to you?

• You are watching your child’s softball game or dance recital, but your mind is on what you need to do tomorrow.
• You are on the phone with a loved one but, rather than listening, you are thinking about what else you could be doing at that moment.
• You are reading the paper or a book but not absorbing the words because your mind is elsewhere.

This happens to all of us. It is not because we love our work more than our children – or our to-do lists more than our conversations with friends. This happens because we are activity-driven and focused on the near-term future. What will happen next often occupies more of our attention than what is happening now. The result is that we have difficulty living in the moment, being fully present, and being mindful.

Psychologists Kirk Warren Brown and Richard Ryan found that mindfulness increases individuals’ psychological well-being and lowers stress (The Benefits of Being Present: Mindfulness and Its Role in Psychological Well-Being, Journal of Personality and Social Psychology 2003, Vol. 84, No. 4, 822–848). They, along with other researchers, characterize mindfulness as being a higher quality of consciousness. And consciousness has two components: awareness and attention.

Being mindful, or fully present, has the benefits of allowing you to offer more of yourself to those you love and while improving your own well-being. Win-win. This holiday season is a great time to practice the two fundamentals of mindfulness.

1. Be aware of the present environment. The holidays are filled with opportunities to slow down and be aware of the present. See the environment you are in – really take the time to soak it in – the lights, the decorations, the people, the sounds. Take a walk and give yourself the freedom to simply observe what is in the environment.
2. Be attentive and focus your awareness to that which matters most. If you are in a conversation with someone you care about, be only there mentally and listening. If you are cooking a holiday dinner be only there and focused on what you are doing.

These two concepts seem easy in theory, but tend to be difficult in practice for most people. Why not give them a try this holiday season?

I wish you a happy and mindful holiday season.

Paula